Chapter Ninety-Four: Resolutions of An-Almost-20-Year-Old

Happy New Year! It's hard to believe we are already in the year 2016. My biggest challenge at the start of every year is writing the correct date...lucky for us, 5 can easily be converted to a jagged 6. At the start of the year, it's common for people to make resolutions, or goals, to achieve in the next year. I've never really done this, not because I think I'm a perfect human being, but because I usually never think of a couple of goals in time for the new year. There's always talk of the "New Year; New Me" buzz, but most of us can see through this fairly quickly. Not to rat on anyone who is making an effort to change themselves, but it is not common to find someone who has actually stuck with their New Years Resolution.
But, despite all this, I think I've decided to make some resolutions. I'm basing my resolutions on a quote I stumbled upon on Facebook, or Twitter (some mindless social media platform) by Mark Twain. Keep in mind, this is from the internet, so I'm not sure how real or accurate this is, but this quote really sums up what I want from myself in 2016.

"Life is Short; Break the Rules; Forgive Quickly; Kiss Slowly; Love Truly; Laugh Uncontrollably and Never Regret Anything that Makes You Smile."

As an almost-20-year-old, I feel constantly torn between growing up and becoming an adult and holding on to my childhood past. I am far from independent, but I feel like I am working most of the time (either at Red Lobster or at school). I'm going to have to do taxes or whatever working individuals fill out in the beginning of the year. Next fall I will be in schools observing, and interacting with students. Like a teacher. An adult teacher. But I am still a kid, aren't I? Heck, I am currently listening to a Disney Pandora station. I still cry pretty easily, and enjoy wearing onsies. How can I balance these seemingly conflicting personas? Who am I?
I don't think it's ever too late to do some self-discovery. At my age especially, discovering who we are is something that echoes throughout my entire generation. Now, I don't think it's right to be selfish and self-absorbed, but focusing on ourselves is something that is essential in some aspect...after all, isn't it said that we cannot love others without first loving ourselves?
So, my New Years Resolutions...involve self-discovery as well as self-loving. Not only that, but allowing that love to reach others around me. And while I realize you and I are not the same person, I encourage you to do a little self-discovery, too. It could do us all some good, I think.

"Life is Short..."
This is true. One could argue that 70 or 80 years is a long time, but then again, are we even guaranteed that? I can barely grasp the fact that I'm turning 20 this month. That's two whole decades. Golly. My resolution is to value time. Value my friends, family, dog, and so many more blessings from Christ. 
"...Break the Rules..."
I am not planning on streaking, stealing, or cheating by any sort. The only rules I will be breaking are the restrictions placed on me by myself. "I can't work out because I'm too busy" or "I don't want to clean because I'm tired". Says who?! My resolution is to break free from my personal limitations and open up new opportunities for myself.
"...Forgive Quickly..."
Holding a grudge is so exhausting. Constantly reminding myself of what someone did or said or whatever just further hurts them, the relationship, and me. We have a merciful God who continuously forgives us over and over without fail. Blessed Mother Teresa said many wonderful things, especially involving kindness and forgiveness. My resolution is to be kind as well as forgiving.

"...Kiss Slowly..."
It's easy to get caught up in the busyness of this age, but it's important to take time to slow down and enjoy the moment. To stop being in a rush. To breathe. My resolution is to slow down and breathe. Enjoy the moments that will never happen again. Be thankful. 
"...Love Truly..."
Honesty is an underrated virtue in this day and age. As well as love. Not only should we love ourselves and others, but we should also be honest with ourselves and others. When we are not honest, walls are put up, which further isolate us from love. My resolution is to love; clearly and honestly. Mean what I say and be true in my actions. 

"...Laugh Uncontrollably..."
Happiness. Joy. These emotions are hard to come by, especially as we get older. Children seem to laugh to easily...my niece is experimenting with jokes right now and is constantly giggling to herself because she finds herself so funny. Just hearing her laugh lifts my spirits. My resolution is to take a lesson from children and seek happiness. After all, "adults are only kids grown up, anyway."
"...And Never Regret Anything that Makes You Smile."
Like I said, happiness is hard to come by. I think the key to keep our smiles is to find what brings it there in the first place. I find so much joy in actively participating in The Church, and interacting with Her members. I find joy by going on adventures with my friends. My resolution is to find happiness, and to keep my smile by doing what I love. 


I hope you all have a great new year. Thanks for reading...and good luck on your resolutions!